A Dogs Prayer

My dog, The one that I had loved and cared for, is now gong to die? My heart was pounding out my chest and my eyes would not stop the tears. My brain was asking questions and trying to remember all of the wonderful times we had before he was gone. He was limping into the vets’ and my mom said, “He is so strong, if we didn’t do this he would stay and go through much more pain.” I wanted time to stop and give me more time to laugh and hug him, but it seemed like a millisecond before we had to go into the room where he would have his last moments in. My mom was saying prayers that I couldn’t follow, but I couldn’t see anything around me, I was trying to catch my breath but it seemed like I was underwater. The vet came in and started explaining what was going to happen. I didn’t want to hear this, I wanted to grab my dog and love him for one more day, but I couldn’t. That would be selfish. He was in too much pain and I was too young to understand why. She took the needle out, and I was bawling. He was trying to stay awake, to spend another year with us. I knew he wanted the same thing. We grew up together, a brother and sister bond. His eyes flickered and then closed. In that moment I wanted to roll over and die. I wanted to float up to the heavens with him. Nothing else mattered in that moment but for him to know how much I thought about him, how many times I needed him. I felt my heart stop, or what felt like it. I knew that his heart was pounding slower and slower each moment until it failed to beat again.
The vet said, “ I am sorry, he has…” We all started sobbing before she concluded her sentence. Hysterically crying out to undo what we have done to this amazing creature, but we couldn’t. The vet let us mourn over our loss for a few minuets, then walked back into the room that had death and murder in it. I was heartbroken and depressed with despair, how was I supposed to go on without my dog? I was furious with life and the fact that some power above stole my best friend. The vet interrupted my thoughts and crying to ask us questions like, “Have you decided whether you are going to cremate him or not?” All the while I was regretting my whole life, wanting to go back and spend all of my time with him. I felt lost without my companion, the first one that I went to when I felt bad. I was shocked that this had happened in this one little day. The day that I would remember, regret, and think about, was the day that my best friend from birth passed away.